There are no words to describe seeing your youngest son lying motionless and unresponsive in an intensive care unit with the sounds of machines that are keeping him alive.
The hardest and most cruel part of all of this is that Jord looked like he was just asleep. He was so warm to touch, that great big heart of his heart was beating and as I held his hand, I beckoned him to open his eyes, but I knew deep down Jord wasn’t with us anymore.
Jord always carried a donor card, and it was his wish that if anything happened to him, he would want to help others. He was always so vocal about this.
I knew the situation with Jord would be difficult due to the way he had died; a murder investigation had begun with a police investigation ongoing. At the time of Jord’s death, I was a serving Detective Constable for West Yorkshire Police in The Murder Investigation Team and I realised that there could be a high possibility that Jord could not be a donor because of this ongoing investigation.
I was adamant that Jords voice would be heard, this is what he wanted, and knowing that he could go on to save lives made it somewhat bearable that Jords life stood for something.
As a family, we were all in agreeance.
We spoke to the donor liaison team who were amazing and explained everything to us as a family. I told them of Jords wishes and that as his injuries were all in his head there should be no reason to allow him not to be a donor. There was no reason to deprive my son of his wish to help others.
The donor team explained that the decision sits with the coroner and it is their decision to make. They consider the police investigation, and the families wish to make a decision that is based on all the facts presented to them.
The coroner made the decision very quickly that Jord could be an organ donor.
I won’t lie this came with mixed emotions, the devastation that I was losing my youngest child but a sense of pride that Jords voice had been heard. The roller coaster of emotions was softened by the donor team who never left our side throughout this final journey.
As a family, everything was explained right down to the final detail, and we knew what was happening every step of the way.
We had the precious time to be with Jord as a family, to hold him, and tell him how much we loved him and how amazing he was giving people the gift of life. We were introduced personally to the transplant team who would look after Jord and they were so lovely seeing how grateful they are as a team made it so humbling.
When it was time for Jord to take his last journey, myself, Ian my husband, Tom Jords brother and Kelly his fiancée walked him to the theatre. As we walked beside Jord, nurses, doctors, hospital staff and members of the public came onto the corridors to pay tribute to our boy. I have never witnessed anything like this, nor will I ever feel or see anything like this in my lifetime again.
As we stopped outside the doors to the theatre, I knew this would be the last time I would hold my boy. I kissed him, told him I loved him, I was so proud of him, and right up until the end he was still thinking of others.
It took all my strength not to run after Jord as he went down that final corridor, but this wasn’t anyone’s moment other than Jords moment.
This was Jords choice, his decision to be a donor, and this selfless act went on to save many lives.
As a family, we felt that Jords life stood for something, and we are so proud that he went on to change and make a difference to other donor recipients’ lives.
We love you Jord and are so incredibly proud of you.
The family would like to thank Northern General Hospital (Sheffield) donor team, the ICU team, and all staff.
They really helped us as a family and are still doing so today.